“I love you” 😍
February is often a time that we reflect on what it means to love another person. For some, Valentines Day is a celebration of a loving relationship in their life. For others, this day brings with it feelings of grief at lost love or shame associated with being alone or in a relationship where they are unsatisfied.
I am about to use a metaphor from the Bible 😮, if you are not Christian, I encourage you to hang in there. I promise you can relate no matter what your belief system is.
In the Christian faith, there is a scripture in which Jesus asks one of his disciples Peter, “who do you say that I am?” (Matthew 16:15). While Jesus, unlike us humans, knew what Peter’s answer would be, he understood that what we believe about a person impacts how we view them and those they love. If you love someone, you treat those that they love with kindness and respect as well.
This has never been more clear to me than it is as I prepare for my journey of motherhood. I know that once this child is born, one of the best ways that I will experience love is when another person treats my child with love.
There is a dark side to this too… Parents get blamed for a lot of the behaviors that their children display. It is hard to separate sometimes who we are from what we do and what those that we love do. I know that even before my baby is born, I have felt the weight of “getting it right.”
The hard truth is that when we expect perfection from ourselves, we often unwittingly expect perfection from others (although, of course I am sure that this doesn’t apply to you because you are perfect 😉).
Whether you are a parent, a partner, a child, a teacher, or part of any other human relationship… I encourage you to do the following meditation to foster self-love so that you can foster love for others:
MEDITATION PRACTICE FOR CULTIVATING LOVE
**Take a couple of deep breaths**
PAUSE and notice what you are thinking and feeling right now
ACCEPT that what you feel is neither good nor bad, but information
BE CURIOUS about what your feeling is telling you that you need
(not what you want someone else to do, but rather what is in your control)
EXPRESS gratitude and love toward yourself and others thinking of a short positive statement that affirms strengths not deficits
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